i don't know what it is... i don't think i'm happy.. since i'm not smiling.. i don't think i'm sad.. since i'm not jerking tears.. just plain...it sucks.. my interest to do anything..fade away.. ah, emptiness maybe.. whatever it called, it doesn't matter.. everything just come and gone.. i don,t get it why it has to come anyway kinda fool.. it pisses me off.. ah, now i'm getting mad..angry ? i don't think so..not really..well completely not..perhaps.. then i start to write this.. in the end i don't feel any change.. it's just the same as before.. it seems like.. boredom has been trying to kill me slowly...step by step.. yeah, boredom,, i'm getting bored? no,,i think i'm not.. uneasy and irritated maybe..i don't know.. ah fuck off...